I Can't Resist....My Thoughts on 90210

They are so trying to make this show edgy.

(Did the first school scene really start with a top-secret blowjob in the school parking lot?)

Let's take a minute to remember the good old days!



But...I kind of want to make the re-vamped theme song my ringtone.

Annie really reminds me of a combo of two famous ladies.




There is a part of me that loves that she is a theater nerd.


But really...even West Beverly wouldn't get the rights to Spring Awakening right now!
(Spoken by a TRUE theater nerd:)

Kelly has a son??? Wait....what happened to Dylan?


I love it that Hannah Zuckerman-Vasquez got a shout-out!(and it was funny when the teacher said...what..is she 30? Nice callback to Hannah's mom!)



How excited was this guy when 90210 called?

(Because as far I've seen, he has lived at the bar at Red Rock since around 2002)

Where's Mrs. Teasley? She would have appreciated a call too dammit!


Do I look that old? ( You'd better be thinking no!)

(sorry Shannen:( I still adore you!!)

I kind of love her...but does that mean I would be Erin Silver if I was the youth of today? Because that makes me feel weird.


Brilliant casting...hiring Jessie Spano.




And...sorry new 90210...I can't let it slide...am I honestly supposed to believe she is celebrating her sweet sixteen? Because she looks like she is 45.


I love how they made THIS 90210 more ethnically appropriate.


I mean...on the original...can you think of anyone ethnic besides that kid DeShawn that Brandon tutored on the basketball team and Steve's freshman buddy Herbert?

By the way...while looking for a picture of Herbert...I found out some disturbing info. Guess who his dad is in real life?

(the one on the right:)

Do you think she misses those little Olsen shits?


Do you think he misses Amanda?


I have to say...I do kind of like their vibe together though.


I am SO happy that you are on this show.
(But I still miss Arrested Development every day!)

(Wait...did she just say that back in the day Ricardo Montalban cracked an egg on her ass? I LOVE her)

Awesome cameo. I always loved Sue Ellen.



I love it that *his dad is a porn producer. Now that is the LA I know and love!

(*I did however see a spoiler about Navid that left me very conflicted about things. I don't want to give it away..but when they reveal it, you are going to know EXACTLY what my issue is)

Brandon still stalks Kelly? That is kind of pathetic.

I'm a little hot for teacher.


And Kelly better watch out! As my friend Robin pointed out (and I 100% agree) Brenda is SO going to try to steal him!

I mean, didn't we learn in like 1994 that Brenda is NEVER going to forgive Kelly for stealing Dylan?


One of the most unbelievable parts of the episode to me was when everyone goes to hang out at Santa Monica Pier on a Friday night. Come on...no one goes to that beach at night, ESPECIALLY not Beverly Hills kids. It is super sketchy!


Then again, they actually film this show at Torrance High School...so I guess location is relative!

If the CW doesn't get the ratings that they hope for...might I recommend bringing Emily Valentine back? She could still stir some shit up!

(Can you even believe this is her and that she is super hot now?)

The Olympics....They ALMOST Make Me Want To Exercise

The track athletes blow my mind. I think it is because when I was in 8th grade and had to run the mile....my teacher told me to just go ahead and give up, because the bell was about to ring and I had just started lap 4....at around 35 minutes. True story.


Even though I've been to Jamaica before, I had no idea the Jamaicans were PHENOMENAL runners.

(and for G-d's sake...let the man celebrate in peace!! He just won the GOLD!!)

When I went to Jamaica, I was under the impression that everyone excelled at a different "sport."



No wonder you look so happy. You made it to the Olympics and you are six.



I almost forgot how much I loved this guy.



These chicks are badass.


But I was a little sad when the blond one obsessively thanked this guy....

(FYI: I didn't alter this picture in any way. This is our current leader...at his finest).

Joe and Jessica Simpson could learn something from these two.


I think this girl is creepy.


And this is the cute one.


I don't care if he is always injured...he is f***ing hot!!!


There are some things I love about all the time I have been spending in China.


And there are some things that make me sad.



I wonder how many more records this guy would have had without his 'stache.


I REALLY wanted to make fun of this guy(mainly because he never took those damn sunglasses off), but then, he got the bronze.


Finally, someone Cincinnati

can still look up to.

I loved seeing her watch the swimming. Until I found out she was a school principal. Ugh. No wonder the poor guy doesn't let himself smile that much.



What does make him smile? facebook. Did you hear him say he had checked it twice from Beijing and had 8,000 new friend requests?


I suddenly started feeling a lot better about getting older.



Even though I haven't exercised since 1995.

Meet the Madonna of China. You might have noticed her at the closing ceremonies. Here she is....Wei Wei.


Here's a little known Lisa Gopman fact.....I did shotput and discus on the track team in 8th grade. Sexy huh?

I also played softball for a season. I played catcher and I had no hits. All season.

There are so many reasons that I feel bad for this guy. Do I even need to start with his name?


Synchronized swimming...is kind of amazing. I can barely do a handstand!


(The Pros)



(me and my boyfriend after about 5 bottles of wine:)

Wait....is that Jackie Chan?

(I took a picture of my TV...because I couldn't find it online and I didn't want you to think I was insane)

I don't think anyone can deny that Michael Phelps will be what everyone remembers from these Olympics. But this is going to be a close second in my book.

(and if you don't know...this is an angry taekwondo participant purposely kicking a ref...in the head!!)

So Many Adventures, So Much Time

There is nothing more horrifying than a Chihuahua wearing a mini 2008 Beijing Olympics tracksuit.

( I wish to G-d I had a picture of the dog in the tracksuit, but there was just no way to be discreet and take a picture at the Beverly Center. However, I hope you find this dog in a wig equally creepy)


A) If you keep bleeding love, you are doing something wrong. B) Your song makes my ears bleed.



I can't believe I watched the entire season of this crappy show, and this is the person who won it all.

(and for the record, I was in LOVE with this guy when he was on General Hospital, but this outfit pretty much ruined it for me forever. And the part where he called Rachel Hunter "sexy for a big girl." Pathetic.)


Your boyfriend probably isn't going to feel sorry for you when you complain that your "job" for the day is going to be so annoying....shopping all day for a cocktail dress. What torture!

When you pray to G-d that the dress you are trying on DOES fit, you should probably skip the Cookie Monster cupcake you were planning on getting at the food court.



When you start praying to G-d that the dress you are trying on DOESN'T fit, you probably shouldn't be shopping at Betsey Johnson when you are unemployed.

Just when I thought Criminal Intent couldn't possibly get any better...Chris Noth's replacement was announced.



If my Grandma Rose was alive, I bet she would have at least a solid 20 friends on facebook.

When you don't have a job and you send your lawyer friend a youtube video, you won't understand what he means when he asks you if it is *NSFW.
*And for my fellow out-of-work friends, it means Not Suitable/Safe For Work.

A bride should never force you to wear a dress color named after a random fruit or vegetable. For example, this lovely tangelo color.




Is it wrong that I think the Baby Borrowers is the funniest show on TV this summer?




Lifetime's Fallen Angels week has kept me in front of the TV for 6 hours today. My personal favorite...a heartwarming film about syphilis.



People who love humidity need counseling.


People who love French wine are snobby.



If you are a sommelier, you can drink a bottle of wine each day and call it "work." Note to self, go to sommelier school.


Young actresses...PLEASE...stick to acting. The singing is getting embarrassing.




The Dark Knight moved me in ways I never imagined. Heath Ledger is going to go down in movie history for one of the all time great performances.




My best friend doesn't have a bucket list. She has a "fuck it" list or as she explains....a list of things she wants to never have done when she is lying in her grave. Some list highlights...playing golf, watching NASCAR, and going to Disneyland. Don't you totally get why she is my best friend?


The new Bluetooth law in LA isn't helping anyone to drive better. It is just making everyone look even crazier.


In fact, I am kind of missing the good old days.



It is really hard to say which one of these three is more screwed up, but I guess I'm leaning toward the one that averages 8 costume changes during a 45 minute set with his rock band. (And still loves hanging out with Jacko in his free time.)



My two favorite things were you and Rose's St. Olaf stories.



When you actually know(and love) someone on a reality show, for once it isn't fun when the shit hits the fan.



Note to Last Comic auditioners: Just because your friends keep telling you that you are funny, please don't pick the day of auditions to try telling the first joke of your life. Thanks.


Note to Last Comic producers: After I have just waited in line with aforementioned "comics" for five hours, don't ask me to put on a funny hat and entertain the crowd.

(and for the record, I have this exact hat, but I won't let you pimp me out Last Comic.)


Best mugshot ever.




Ask yourself this question, can you imagine anything in this world better than a bar where, when you order a "Top Gun"; they turn on "Danger Zone", hand you a pilot's cap, aviator glasses, and a shot? Because that might have been the single greatest moment of my life so far. (Thank you Grig and thank you NYC!!)

(now this is a funny hat deserving of my time and energy)

I'm Still Alive...and I Am Gathering Some Serious Stories For You!!

Hi everyone! I just wanted to check in with you and tell you that I am still alive...I have just been traveling like crazy(and yes, I am still unemployed, I just fancy myself an unemployed Paris Hilton!) I have done everything from camping, to TWO Vegas trips, lived the east coast life in NYC, saw George Michael live in concert and just attended a wedding I have been looking forward to for a whole year!!! So trust me....some more blogs are coming:) I promise!

And until then...here is a picture that kind of describes what I have been up to since the last time you heard from me!

(This is me, allegedly "not drunk" after a 7 HOUR OPEN BAR!!!!)